January 4, 2011 § 1 Comment
I have finally purchased my very own journal! Not the kind of spiral notebook you can get at Walmart. It’s an actual journal – the nice kind where you can find in bookstores like Barnes and Noble. I have delayed getting one for so long, but today, I have purchased one and I already written my first entry in it. The reason why I delayed so much was because of my terrible handwriting. I didn’t think a beautifully crafted journal was worth the abuse of my chicken scratch.
Three days ago at work, the book “Go Ask Alice” by Anonymous popped up in a foreign cart left from overnight. I was the store fitting room operator for the day and since it was 8am with no one shopping yet, I dove into a book I unexpectedly thought would be one of my favorites. The book only consisted of journal entries of a drug abusing girl who died 3 weeks after her last entry. The people who discovered her journal decided to turn it into a book. Talk about respecting the dead! Hm, it makes me wonder who will read my journal when I die. I still archive a bunch of scrap journaling, poems and essays in a little box from the prior days. I’m almost always not fond of reading them because most of my old writings were so negative, yet very deep.
The newly discovered book about Alice motivates me to practice more self-reflection. If I don’t have a friend to talk about my problems, maybe a small journal will. You can tell it anything, and as a result, you’ll feel a little better about yourself. Maybe that’s why I’ve been journaling all along – it’s all I’ve ever known since I was 12.